a reminder to protect Caleb

Dateline NBC has been running a series on sexual predators who go after children. It's a sting operation where they rent out a house and attract perverts over the Internet. When the perp shows up, thinking he's going to have sex with a 14-yr old girl, or a young boy or something like that, then the host comes and tries to interview him, etc. Once the perp leaves, he is instantly arrested for (I guess) attempted statutory rape or whatever the official charge is.

Well, one perp shows up with his son, who probably wasn't a year or so older than Caleb. Mhy contempt and hatred for such a person knows no bounds. What kind of person would, not only do such a thing as seek out children and teens on the Internet, but then bring his own son to such a thing? It is a reminder to me of the pervasive sin that inhabits our world. People can sink lower and lower into the cesspool of sin that Satan wants them in to the utter disgust of everyone else.

Let me amend something I said a little earlier. I do not hate the person. I hate that sin, maybe more than any other sin. To harm a child leaves one deserving of a special ring of hell. But there is good news for such a person. Even they too can be saved because of the grace of Jesus Christ

Eventually this group will be put together

I'm still hard at work setting up my next generation me's group. So far it looks like I've got 4 (Paul Dietrich, Jim Hankins, Tim Barron and Bill Davis). I've got phone calls out to a couple of other guys and a couple of more on this list to get ahold of this week. I'm reembering that putting this together last year took a bit of effort also. Those who were on my 'A' list didn't make the final cut. This year is developing about the same way. It's taking more time than expectedand some of the men I wanted won't be able to do it.

It is still my goal to be up and running by the middle of June, hopefully in about 3 weeks. There's also the issue of the upcoming backpack trip the last week in June. I don't want to meet for the first time the week before and then be gone. But I don't want to wait until the first week of July to start either. I want to get this all done and set up before the end of this week.

last chapter on King David

Dan Dutcher gave us men an intersting assignment for our last Saturday together. We are looking at 2 Sam 22, which is bascially David's reflection upon his life and what God has done with and through him. I aske Dan to lead us this week and to come up with a creative way to do it.

The assignment is to see ourselves in the story...really, it's a poem. How does it reflect our lives? What God has done? What we have been through in life? For myself, I came up with 4 different reflections on this chapter.

1. Ch 22:2-3. David refers to God with 9 different terms, each preceded by the word 'my'. David's God is personal. The words he uses (rock, fortress, deliverer, strength, stronghold, salvation, refuge, shield and Savior) can all be used somewhat interchangeably. David' is defining God in relationship to how God has acted in David's life. So with me. I want to treat God in a personal way. At time, He has been all these things to me and more.

2. Ch 22:20. DAvid says that God "delivered me because He delighted in me". God did not deliver David because He had to in a theological way, or because He was obligated to because that is just what God does. No, He did it because He delighted in David. I need to remember this as well. God acts in my life because He likes me, because He delights in me.

3. Ch 22:30. One of my favorite phrases in the DAvid canon. It says, "For by You I can run against a troop. By My God, I can leap over a wall." The imagery here is strong. I can realte. I am a pastor because God has called me to be one. But it is only by His Grace that I can be one. Like David, because of God I can do mighty things for His Kingdom.

4. Ch 23:5. DAvid becomes humble here, as I should. He writes that a Godly king should be a breath of fresh air, that he must be just in ruling the people God has given him. But then the humility kicks in. He says, "Although my house is not so with God, yet He has made with me an everlasting covenant." DAvid know that he has not always lived up to the standard that God calls him to, but he knows that God has still established a covenant with him. So also with me, I am not a perfect pastor. Never will be. I will fail people and at times probably do things with less integrity than I would like. Although I am a pastor, I am still prone to sin. God still works with me. He does not abandon me.

poem for Mephibosheth

This is the poem that I wrote on our mens' retreat last weekend. The passage that I chose was 2 Sam 9, which details David's attempts to find someone to minister to, someone to show God's love or 'hesed' to. He finds Mephibosheth, Jonathan's son and brings him into the palace, gives him land and has him eat at David's table. Basically, Mephibosheth was being treated as one of David's advisors.

But when looking at the passage again, I found myself in Mephibosheth's shoes. Like him, I was an outcast before Jesus found me. I have no part of God's Kingdom and no meal at His table unless I am invited there by the king. THis poem is my attempt to put myself in the place of Mephibosheth.

I am Mephibosheth
Lame in my feet because of sin
I cannot be at your table
Sharing your bread and wine

Yet You call to me
Bringing lovingkindness to one who does not deserve it
You prepare a banquet for me
And invite me to eat with you forever

Such knowledge is too wonderful for me
How can I repay? How can I respond?
It is for me to respond to your call
Everyday eating bread at your table

My heart rests in you daily
It is You and You only who brings bread that has life
Keep me close to your heart
Don't let me get hungry for other bread
Bread that tastes good for a moment but does not fill

Let me hunger daily for your table
May I be confident in Your Bread's Goodness
May I see Your Face daily
And be filled with hunger for only You.

my turn next

Remember that poem that I was going to post? It got delayed a bit because of family illness. Both Christa and Caleb have been sick. Christa was fine when she went to bed on Tues about 9:30, but by the time I hit the sack at 11, she was sick. She was throwing up all night. I had to take Wed off of work to pl;ay nursemaid for her and Mr. Mom for Caleb. Of course by Wednesday afternoon, Caleb had it. Not the throwing up, but the fever. He had a bit of a tough night, but he does well once the Motrin kicks in. Then he's back to normal.

If our family history holds true, I should come down with it on Friday or so. I'm usaully the last one. I'm not the carrier but the end result of all the germs in the family. So I write this tonight, fully healthy, but also having a reasonable expectation of getting sick in the next day or so. Just in time for a 3 day weekend.

men's retreat roundup

This last weekend I took the men from my discipleship group up to Tahoe for an overnight retreat. As Sandy Fasold commented on Sunday afternoon, i did beat them up pretty well. Since this is the end of our year-long group, I asked the men to pick a passage in the David story that was meaningful and to reflect on it further. I also gave them a companion passage to go along with it and sent them out into the woods for two hours to spend time with God.

It was a pretty dramatic time for the men. When we were sharing later about our experience, two of the men ended up in tears because of what God is doing in their lives. I ended up writing a poem about my experience, which I will post later tonight.

guess who knows

Uh-oh, I just told Matt about the blog. Matt and i had a blog a couple of years ago after he had converted to the Eastern Orthodox church. It was a blog that dealt primarily with theological issues and was the subject of some rabid debates. Food was also a constantly discussed item (He still thinks he's a better cook than I, but I've still got a 2-1 advantage in our cook-offs). My part on the blog ended because I did not have enough time to fully participate, still being in seminary and all. Even when I did, Matt wrote much more consistently than I did. I often felt that it was not 'our' blog but rather I was in the role of simply responding to him. After I left the blog, he picked up the thread of it and went with it for a while longer until, if i remember correctly, his pastor told him to stop. It's probably still floating out there in cyberspace somewhere.

cuddle break

I had to take a quick cuddle break. Christa is pretty tired tonight. Keeping up with a rambunctious 3-yr old can be pretty draining. He is at that strange age where he doens't need a nap, but he does need a nap. If he takes a nap, he is usually out for 2 1/2 to 3 hours and has trouble going to sleep at night. But if he doesn't have a nap, he gets REALLY cranky about 5:30/6 PM. We can't really wake him up after an hour or so of his nap, because he does not wake up really well. I guess it is obvious. We have become slaves to our 3-yr old boy.

recruiting for the men's group

Last year, when I created my men's discipleship group, it took a bit longer to put together than I thought. I imagined that I could call the men I wanted one week and start meeting the next. Didn't quite work out that way. If I recall correctly, I began recruiting in early April and we didn't start meeting until the middle of May.

I thnk I learned my lesson. Even though the beginning of Round 2 won't be for another month or so, I'm already on the phone inviting men to come aboard for this experience. Technically, I'm 1 for 1. I'm starting to think that Christa and I are theonly ones home n a weeknight. Between last night and tonight, I've called 7 people and talked to exactly 1 live person- who, by the way, wants to be in the group. I'm going to give the others a few more days to call back and then I'll try again.

Men's Group- 2nd edition

Exciting ties in men's ministry. The men I've been meeting with for a year now ar ready to 'graduate' and move on to bigger and better things. Which means that it is time for the next group. I've got a list of 14 names to choose from, and I'm looking for 6-7 guys who are willing to commit to a year of study and discipleship. This year, we're going to go through the stories of the Patriarchs in Genesis (Abraham, Isaac, Jacob and Joseph) We're also going to read about 5 books, and I'm thinking they might be the same as last year. Tozer, Brother Lawrence, Lewis, a' Kempis and Nouwen were our teachers. At this point, I'm not planning to tweak the reading. We'll also do 2 overnight retreats instead of just one.

Lord, give me wisdom in picking these men. Give me men who want to learn and be in fellowship with one another. SOften their hearts to hear Your Word and make them men of God. Help me as their shepherd to guide them in right paths. Give me patience with those who might be slower.

to Tahoe, to Tahoe we go

This weekend, my Men's discipleship Group and I are headed off to a mini-retreat (just overnight) near Lake Tahoe. In a way, this will be bit of a sad trip since it marks the wrap-up time for a group that has been meeting for a year.

This is a group of men whom I picked to spend a year studying with me in an attempt to grow in their faith. The group has been largely successful. We've studied the life of King David, read some other books, and gone to services at a number of different churches to what they do and why they do it. But I think the biggest growth has come from being in Scripture consistenly over the period of a year. These guys aren't just reading a devotional page, but are actually mining Scripture for gold nuggets. And I've been greatly pleased with all of their growth. My prayer is that they take some of this spiritual discipline and carry it over once the group is over in a few weeks.

first devotional for worship team

Last night was the first of many times that I'll be doing a devotional time for our Worship team. TJ's been great to allow me to do that. I'm appreciative of the chance for more up-front teaching. God has gifted me to do it, but I still need to practice. Bayy Bonds may be a great hitter (sans 'roids) but he still needs to get into the batting cage.

The theological question that I asked and tried to at least somewhat answer in 10 minutes has to do with the commands in Scripture to confess our sins. If we are Christians because Jesus died for us on the cross, and rose from the dead to defeat death, then why confess sins? If our sins are already forgiven by virture of Jesus' sacrifice, then why confess?

We are called to confess our sins, not because God needs us to, but because we need to. Knowing that our sins are forgivne is something that we mauy know theologically, maybe even in our mind, but we don't often have an experience of what forgiveness is. This is where daily confession of sin comes in. The act of confessing brings us closer to the heart of God. We are forced to reflect upon our sinfullness, which is also often overlooked. By confessing our sin, we come closer to the cross of Christ and learn how to experience forgiveness.

Application?? Spend a couple of minutes before bed in prayer, going over your day and asking forgiveness for the sins you have committed. The Holy Spirit will bring them to your attention. Confess them and seek forgivensss. Learn what forgiveness means in an experiential way. And after you have done this, you will have an easier time forgiving others. A sense of our own sinfullness makes it much tougher to withhold forgiveness from another.

Postcard #1

Did I mention my beloved Giants???

First game of the season tonight. Giants vs Cubs. Since Pacbell Park (or whatever they're calling today) opened, I'm 11-0 at Giants games. Tonight I'm going with David Fasold, y pastor/boss and his son. They're Cubs fans, but i won't hold that against them. I'm looking forward to a chance to pick Dave's brain on some ministry items. It's also my first chance to just hang with him for a few hours and develop our friendship. We have an intersting dynamic between us. He's not only a Type a personality, he's an A+. Not me. I'm much more mellow. So he tends to talk more in our relationship.

first time on board

I suppose that the first thing I should do is mention a couple of things about myself by way of introduction. My name is Jeff Miller and I live in the beautiful community of Hercules with my wonderful wife Christa and adorable 3-year old son Caleb. Yes, he is the best little boy in the world, not that I am biased.

I've got two jobs, one that pays the bills and the other one that I love. Actually, the one that pays the bills I love too, but for a different reason than you might think. I'm an Assistant Vice President at a community bank called The Mechanics Bank. I'm well into my 10th year at the bank, and as far as a secular job goes, it's the best I've ever had. Virtually no bureacracy. My boss Tom Brennan says yes or no and that's about it. I do auto loans, both underwriting and marketing. I spend about 3 days in the office going over loan applications for auto loans, checking contracts, etc. The other two days I'm out seeing car dealers and marketing them for their auto loans. It's a great balance. Having been there so long and being pretty good at what I do, I don't have to think about my job all that much. I dont' really think about it before I go into the office and I don't think that much about it once I leave.

My second job, on the other hand, keeps me focused almost 24 hours a day. You see, I'm a pastor. Part-time at this point, but full time in another year and a half to two years. I'm on staff at Bay Hills Community Church in El Sobrante and am in charge of Small Groups and Discipleship. Ministry keeps you going 24 hours a day, even though I'm only getting 'paid' for about 8 hours a week. Much more than that goes it.

That's the 50-cent tour version, but there's much more detail to come. Only so much at once.

The purpose of this blog ( I sound like I'm back at seminary writing a paper) is to encourage and challenge. A lot of thoughts about Scripture and ministry will permeate this blog. What is going on in my ministry will also get a lot of play. Then there are such essentials as great food and restaurants, Johnny Cash and a cast of characters that you will meet who are unforgettable. If some of them did not exist, it would be necessary to invent them. You'll meet Matt Karnes (epicuriean/Eastern Orthodox-formerly Calvinist Pentecostal. There's Bryan (formerly Bryguy) who is so Calvinistic in his outlook that he out-Calvins Calvin. Keith, Mike, George, etc. Plus there's TJ, our worship pastor who my 3-year old wants to be like.

So much for a brief introduction. Get ready and let's have some fun. Goody-goody.